Our hosts for this evening are two curmudgeonly old codgers in tuxedos by the unlikely nom de plonk of Bidgie Reef & The Gas. One of them's a dead ringer for Pete Waterman, the other the speccy one from Raw Sex. It soon becomes clear, however, that they are actually Eddie and Chris Brut's future selves beamed back from 40 years hence. Neat.

It's a measure of how far Art Brut have come that their overlooked nearly-been heroes, David Devant & His Spirit Wife, are now supporting them. Confusingly, David Devant is not the name of the singer, he is simply "The Vessel" through whom the spirit of Dave and his missus are channelled. Or something. At three feet tall in high heels and quiff, Mr Vessel could well be Britain's answer to Prince. In the same way that Keith Chegwin is Britain's answer to Evel Knievel.

Next up are four bum-fluffed whippersnappers calling themselves Killing Moon. They look and sound well smart, dressed in de rigeur short-sleeves, pin-stripes and dead men's ties. The comparison everyone's making tonight is Bloc Party, and although we already had one of those last time I looked, it's no bad place to start. Minus points must be deducted for using nine guitar pedals, having a song about tequila and a drummer that looks like Thom Yorke. Whether or not they've actually got any tunes yet is hard to tell over their 15 minute flurry, but since they're all only about 12 years old, there's plenty of time for all that nonsense. Now get to bed.

Compared to them Art Brut are veritable veterans. Has it really been eight years since they first unleashed that cataclysmic, catastrophic, classic cacophony Formed A Band? No. It's only been eight months. It just feels that long.

Art Brut arrived with an admirable if unlikely dual-pronged manifesto of bringing about world peace and getting on Top Of The Pops. With IRA decommissioning on the cards and talk of Israel handing back the Gaza strip, it's still 50-50 which one of these they're gonna achieve first. Perhaps aware of this, Eddie Argos has changed some of the words - "I want to be the man who writes the song that makes India and Pakistan get along." A fine sentiment indeed.

But as they shriek, stumble and prance around the stage like a punk magical roundabout - Zebedee on guitar, Ermentrude on bass, Dylan on drums, etc - one can't help feeling that while universal love, peace and harmony is all very well, it really would be a terrible tragedy if the great British viewing several were denied the chance to hear those magical words: "And now, making their debut appearance on Top Of The Pops, straight in at number one . . . put your hands together for ART BRUT!!!"

Let’s make it happen before they banish it to BBC 2 forever. Or failing that, as the ruddy-cheeked Mr Argos implores, “Form a band, or start a fanzine, that’s at least as good as Artrocker!”

Now that shouldn’t be too hard should it?

Review by Mavis Cruet

artbrut.nikkidido.com
www.killingmoon.org
www.doremi.co.uk/dd
www.bidgiereef.com